CALGARY SINGING TELEGRAMS
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  CUSTOMIZED SONG SAMPLES

Below, press play to stop or start music.

It's Your 65th Birthday
(Crazy - Patsy Cline)




Tagen's Favorite Things
(My Favorite Things - Julie Andrews)



Nobody's Done It Better / Happy Retirement
(Nobody Does It Better - Carly Simmon)



Landon Baby / Wedding proposal
(Santa Baby - Joan Javits)




Our Girl Tammy / Engagement Party
(Like A Virgin - Madonna)




Happy Birthday
(I got you babe - Cher)



Jan Frost Jan Frost
(New York New York - Liza Minnelli)



You're A Big Grump
 (You're A Mean One, Mr. Grinch - Dr. Suess)



Let's Hear It For McCoy
 (Let's Hear It For The Boy - Deniece Williams)



Don't Stop Believing, You Still Have Hockey Season 
(Don't Stop Believing - Journey)



Enjoy Your Youth
(Staying Alive - Bee Gees)



Happy Birthday
(Alejandro - Lady Gaga)



Tying The Knot
(Staying Alive - Bee Gees)



At Last, Your Birthday Has Come Along
(At Last - Etta James)



IT'S YOUR BIRTHDAY
(Crazy - Patsy Cline)

It's your birthday,
It's your day to shine, yes it's today
Your birthday,
Is happening around Stampede time
And today,
Your staff has conspired to surprise you
By hiring,
A cowgirl to sing you this song

Thirty, is long over and so is forty,
But fifty, is the new forty so don't despair
(just dye your hair)
And there's Avon,
Increase your orders and you'll be fine
There's always plastic surgery, to make you look thirty
And you can tell'em you're twenty nine.

Oh, it's your birthday,
And all jokes aside, don't ever change,
Let's give a yahoo for the birthday girl Sue,
Oh dear Sue, everybody loves you.
YAHOO!


THIRTY FOUR YEARS
(One Week - Bare Naked Ladies)

 It’s been thirty four years since you were born
You’re husband Chris has hired a purple fairy
To sing to you a birthday song
A thank-you in the form of a parody
Seems like yesterday at the Pizza Hut
You took the job and you met your husband
In Montreal you both quit your jobs
Ran out of money and lived with his parents.

And then you worked at a cookie store, also a book store and you also worked at Wal-Mart.
And then sometime a little later you spent 8 years as a 911 operator.
But time went on and now you are busy doing other work as a Judicial Clerk,
You wear a robe at work and that’s a perk
You’re also very busy being a mother
To your son Hunter, who is too smart for his own good
And then there’s Merrik, a 6 year old, superhero
Who wants to save the world
Last but not least there is Scotia, she’s like her muttha
She has a passion for animals

Speaking of pets, I think you know where this is going
Amber takes in pets and her collections  growing
She works all day and when she leaves the courtroom
It’s straight home to tend to her exotic pets

She’s got twelve pets to feed and groom
I can’t believe her house has that much room


ROBSTAR
(Rockstar - Nickelback)

I’ve done a lot of thinking over the years
I’m sick of healthy livin’ and Coors light beers
I wanna change my life
Now that I’ve turned 30
(Tell me what you want)

I want a brand new house that’s not made of wood
But from scraps of the dumpsters in my neighborhood
I want to drink all day with my buddy Dean
(What else do you want?)

I wanna go fly fishing and golf all week
Get drunk and take a whiz in my kitchen sink
Dive into a dumpster and rip my jeans
(Been there, done that)
I wanna go home later and drink a flat
Tie a Velcro holster to my fuzzy cat
To feed my drunken curiosity
(Then what will you do with her?)
I’ll stick her on the ceiling and see how long

Until she falls right down or it just feels wrong
 

Cuz we all just wanna be big Robstars
Drink tequila shots and throw up in cars
While we’re driving down the Deerfoot trail
I just hope that nobody ends up in jail
And we’ll get banned from the coolest bars
Do
stupid stunts that leave big scars
Go diving in an old junk pile

Everybody’s got a paramedic on speed dial
And well, hey, hey, I wanna be a Robstar
Hey, hey, I wanna be a Robstar

I wanna go to work and see your faces

When I kick your (BEEP) at office chair races

After several shots of whiskey, beer and gin

(Sounds like a smashing idea)

 Too much alcohol is the reason

That I ain’t gonna need no freezing

When I fall out of that chair and the stitches need to go in

(How will you handle that?)

 I won’t show no fear or feel no pain

I’ll be so damn wasted I won’t know my name

 Cuz we all just wanna be big Robstars

Drink tequila shots and throw up in cars

While we’re driving down the Deerfoot trail

I just hope that nobody ends up in jail

And we’ll get banned from the coolest bars

Do stupid stunts that leave big scars

Go diving in an old junk pile

Everybody’s got a paramedic on speed dial

I’m gonna drink and drink til I turn green

As long as I can out drink Dean

Dance on the picnic table in my underwear

If I break my toe I just won’t care.

Well, hey hey, I wanna be a Robstar
Hey, hey, I wanna be a Robstar


THAT’S JUST LIKE ERIN
(Like A Virgin - Madonna)
 

She’s gonna watch Grey’s Anatomy
Drink a Caesar or two
Get a buzz and then go downtown

To buy some shoes

Sip some wine

And feel fine

She won’t stop

Until every dime

Is spent all on shoes

Yeah with all that booze

She shops under the influence

That’s just like Erin She knows how to have a good time

Just like ErinHere are some things I heard

Through the grapevine
She loves Salmon Sushi Pizza

Reads gossip magazines Dreams of that time in Vegas when she met Tommy Lee

She's not shy

Speaks her mind
Loves to dance, that's how she unwinds
Grooving all night long
To her favorite songs
She's the life of the party

That’s just like Erin Tough as nails yet smooth as silk
Just like Erin All hung over Drinking chocolate milk

Now she’s fine

What a girl

On her way to be the "King" of the World

With her CIP

Designation it’s plain to see She’ll make history

That's just like Erin
This Aviation Insurance Broker

Just like Erin

Kicking butt in her male dominated world

Just like ErinOh, just like Erin

Tough, but she still cries
Like that time when

They saw Madonna

In Vancouver

Oh, Happy Birthday

Today she is thirty

We know she’ll have a good time 

  SHE’S GETTING MARRIED
(Circus-Britney Spears)


Leah Johnston came into this world

In 1970, on September 30th

And today she’s a real one-of-a kind girl

She’s all grown up now

And she lives in Fernie

 

She’s got a ring now

It’s diamond set

She ordered it herself

Off the internet

She’s getting married soon

 

Everybody knows that Leah has nicknames

Sweetpea and Leah Pea sound kind of the same

And Princess Leah is a fun name to say

But Tompleton is the one that takes the cake

 

Soon her name will be Mrs. Leah McGee

She’s getting married

This wedding really is meant to be

She’s getting married

In the front row will be the gnome that follows wherever she goes

We can pretty much bet she’ll get a picture of that

She’s getting married

 

There’s only one guy for Leah in this world

His name is David McGee and he works at Earls

She acted surprised but she really knew full-well

That he’d propose in the Best Western Hotel

 

And with the ring that she already bought

She answered “Ummmm k”, when the question was popped

“Wanna get married or whatever?”

 

Everybody knows a few things about Leah

She works hard as an esthetician

She scared of cold sores and thinks that she has a moustache

She looked for it while driving once and almost crashed

 

All eyes will be on this beauty queen

She’s getting married

She’ll be running down the isle, you’ll see

She’s getting married

And Cousin Amy, maybe she’ll do that thing with the fork and spoon

Oh yes it’s true, Leah our little Spooner

She’s getting married

Uh huh, ummm, ummm, ummm, ummm, uh huh

I do!

 

This bride-to-be will live happily

She’s getting married

With Dave McGee and their little puppy

She’s getting married

Once at home, she’ll be carried over the threshold with her gnome

All eyes will be on this very strange scene

She’s getting married.

 

All jokes aside, now I’ll tell you why

I’m singing this song

Your mother, Wendy has called on me

To sing you this song

She says you’re beautiful, smart, athletic, and spiritual too

It’s her congratulations on your engagement

You’re getting married!

Xoxo!

Happy Birthday Rap

Pro-cycling, running and hiking
Burning rubber like no other, Myles is fierce as a Viking

He don’t like swimming but he’ll do it for the winning

Put the pedal to the metal like he’s running through the ghetto

He speeds along just like Lance Armstrong

Ironman triathlon, he’s a human King Kong

He’s got 12 of them under his belt

He did 4 of them in Kona and he’s living to tell

Myles has got it going on, he’s got the bragging rights

Looking fine in any muscle shirt and shorts that are tight

And if the shoe won’t fit, you know he’ll still wear it

When it come to mountain biking he just won’t quit, yo

Shoots like a rocket when he’s racing on the street

He stir-fry’s and barbeques when it’s time eat

Off season he drinks beer, otherwise it’s Power Gel

Races in places like Vegas and Cozumel
Loves to travel, likes to sit in the sun

But he’s quick to tan just like a gingerbread man

Goes to training camps, the last was in Penticton

Shops for expensive bikes like it’s an addiction

Put him in a toga and he’ll party hardcore

Do a head-dive straight into the dance floor

Wears bike goggles, goes on boondoggles

When he’s hanging out with Mike and the other Nexen bruthas

“This is the bomb”, Myles says when he’s awestruck

And when something goes wrong it’s “What a cluster muck!”

YO!

50 Years Of Love
(It's not unusual - Tom Jones)


It’s not unusual to hear Geza say, “Yeah Mon”

It’s not unusual to hear Phyllis say, “Oh Definitely”

Whether they’re sipping home-made wine or herbal tea

It’s not unusual to see them smile.

(They have such style)

 

It’s not unusual to see Phyllis baking something

Her Christmas cookies are famous to everyone

And Geza he has four or five tools of every kind

He can fix anything

He whistles while he works

While Phyllis cleans and cooks

Now half a century has gone by

And through the 50 years

They’ve shared laughter and tears

Here’s to Geza, Phyllis and 50 years of love.

 

It’s not unusual to see these two playing bridge

Or spending time at Burnt Stick Lake in their cabin

These liberal love birds like to talk politics

And oh how they love chocolate

They both have strong opinions

And they both envision

More hospitals in Calgary

Phyllis loves to shop for clothes

And Geza watches shows

Like WWF wrestling

 

It’s not unusual for Geza to eat a good steak

It’s not unusual for Phyllis to eat seafood

It’s no wonder they don’t eat much chicken anymore

Because one time Phyllis threw frozen chicken at Geza

Whoa, oh!

 

It’s not unusual to see these love birds together

For 50 years they have honored for worse and for better

They’ve kept their vows to stay with each other forever

It’s so spectacular

50 years has come and gone

And they’re still going strong

Love has kept them young at heart

This doesn’t happen everyday

So it’s time to celebrate

Here’s to Geza, Phyllis and 50 years of love

Yes, here’s to Geza, Phyllis and 50 years of love. 

 

 

Calgary Singing Telegrams Inc.

403-454-SING
 403-454-7464 
calgarysingingtelegrams@gmail.com